Here’s the advice everybody gives you after someone dies. Get out of the house. Volunteer. Join a group. Call your friends. Say yes to things. It’s decent advice. It works for a lot of people. It did not work for Carol Tannenhauser. A Year and Four Months Tannenhauser is 77 and lives on the Upper West Side of Manhattan. She writes and edits for her neighborhood paper, the West Side Rag. She was 22 when…